Today is Christmas, and four days ago my mother-in-law passed away in an ICU hospital room after fighting a disease called Graft vs. Host. After being diagnosed with Leukemia in March of last year, she started chemo. right away and was even able to get a bone marrow/stem cell transplant in July. She did great through all of this and it seemed like things were going in a good direction. It was a long road, but we were hopeful of her recovery. If you want to learn more and be blessed by reading of her faith and character through this process you can visit her Caring Bridge site here.
We discovered just weeks ago that the transplant she received was not successful, as only 2-5% of her cells belonged to the donor. This was difficult news to take in. We didn't know what it would mean, but we were told we could get through the holidays and pursue next steps in January. This changed when Chris was admitted to the ICU upon check in for a visit with a pulmonary specialist on Wednesday the 14th.
That Friday Ben and I met his siblings in IL to drive into the city for the international-themed weekend his parents planned for us. Originally, they planned a trip to Europe, but this was cancelled after Chris was diagnosed. Instead, we would to go the German Christmas Markets in Chicago (very authentic to the ones we would have visited in Nuremberg, Germany), sleep and dine at the Intercontinental Hotel, and have lunch at a Swedish restaurant on Saturday. The hospital she was in was just blocks from the hotel. This allowed us to still do some of the planned activities and visit her afterwards. It was hard to be there without her, but we knew she would want us to enjoy ourselves. It was a very surreal experience, going from enjoying activities to seeing her in the hospital in such a weakened state and wanting her to join us.
The day we planned to leave, it seemed like her health was getting worse. We all came back the next day, not realizing it would be one of the last times we would be able to talk with her. Her breathing was short so she was required to be on an oxygen mask that prevented her from communicating verbally with us. My parents came to be with me and to see her. Her parents and some of her brothers came. We were there every day and I barely thought about anything else all week. I drove to my parents' house not far from the city to spend the night. Ben joined me one of those times, never wanting to leave the hospital room.
When Chris passed away on Wednesday, a week after being admitted to the ICU, we had already been grieving for days. My heart was sad just to see her state, and it broke for Ben and his family as they helplessly watched their mom and wife look less and less like the vibrant, classy woman that she was. I couldn't understand how things had progressed so quickly. It didn't seem to make sense at all. The past few days have been a combination of feeling sadness and missing her, yet remembering that she is in heaven now, and there is no better place than the presence of Christ.
Right now this side of my family is learning how to mourn, and it is not easy. Sometimes we just want to cry...a lot. Other times we feel like we should be crying more. There was joy in celebrating Christmas together today, but her presence was missed, and this causes sadness. In our sadness we have cried together, lifted one another up, and acted as a team. Through this bonding and true love displayed, I have been blessed.
Christine Newton was an amazing woman, admired for her godly and authentic character, and I could not have asked for a better mother-in-law. I am so sad not to have years ahead to share with her, but I can't wait to see her in heaven and celebrate with her there!
Here are some pictures from this weekend, that were possible because of she and Bud's generosity and love for life.
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